AND SO IT BEGINS...AGAIN

Here we go again; the hustle and bustle of the holiday season. I can easily say that it crept up on me this year, but then again, I say that every year. I'm very verbal when it comes to premeditated Christmas decorations. As soon as Halloween ends, people are overly excited about putting up colorful lights and decorating every inch of their life with wreaths and snowballs. I loathe it. Can we just slow down? We have a whole two months before jolly St. Nick comes sliding down the chimney baring gifts to all the good boys and girls. As I type this, I realize, damn, it’s only a month till Christmas is here. Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. FML!

Truth be told, I used to be one of those people who couldn't wait to put up the wreaths, bust out the Christmas plates and candy bowls, and hang a wreath on my front door. What changed? Well, a lot has changed. O.k. One major thing has changed. That one thing made a big impact on my feelings about the holidays. My husband passed away over 2 years ago. Since then, holidays haven't been the same. As hard as I try to get into the holiday spirit, I find that a lot of that spirit is just for show.

Not only did the holiday season creep up, but so did the loneliness. My kids are older and are not as enthusiastic about the holidays like they were before. Maybe they feel the same way as I do, but their busy, young adult life keeps them pre-occupied from thinking about it. I, too, try to remain busy so that I don't have to think about it. But, if you know me, I don't like people. I don't like people in a sense that I cannot stand shopping, being out on the road, and dealing with holiday rudeness.

So this holiday season will be low key; internet TV, my Surface tablet, YouTube Red music and a lot of snuggles with my furbabies. I pray that I survive another holiday season without breaking down.

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